


Carry You Home

by weird_aunt_writing



Category: Starship Promise (Visual Novel)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-14
Updated: 2018-11-14
Packaged: 2019-08-23 15:29:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,763
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16621625
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/weird_aunt_writing/pseuds/weird_aunt_writing
Summary: To release some of the tension of the past few weeks the crew plans to go dancing and Orion bring Juliette something to wear.





	1. Carry You Home (pt. 1)

As the hot water hit my back I felt another wave of gratefulness to Nova for lending me her shower again. Followed shortly thereafter by a wave of guilt. Orion insisted I continue to use his room even if we were on a break but I couldn’t bear to stay our room or use our shower when I couldn’t call it ours. Nova had been generous enough to lend me hers the past week and Jaxon helped me clear out an extra room to sleep in, but the longer this separation between Orion and I went on the more I felt like a burden to everyone.

Throughout the past few months both the Union and the Empire have called me “useful” or “skilled” and during my time with the crew of The Promise I really began to feel like I was. When I could actually help them. Now that I didn’t have as much to do and tension flowed anytime Orion and I were in the same room I started to doubt if I was ever really that useful at all. Was I only helpful because Orion gave me something to do? Did I only feel special because Orion made me feel that way?

I started to wonder if maybe my time for adventuring was up. If maybe I should just go back to Olympus 7, back to my parents, and back to the life of an ordinary engineer. I didn’t want to. Not when I finally really felt like part of the crew. But I also knew that if that’s what the crew needed, if that’s what Orion needed, to move forward then that’s what I’d do.

Shaking myself out my pity party I finished up my shower and stepped out. Maybe not the best shower I ever had but I wouldn’t take all the hot water when I still felt like such a dead weight. I can at least do that right even when it feels like I can’t do anything else.

I wrap a warm fluffy towel around my body but before I move to leave something makes me pause at the mirror. What I see almost makes me gasp. Dark half-moons shade the bottoms of my eyes and my eyes themselves look dull, like I’m barely even awake on my feet. Maybe spending a week where the only sleep I got ranges from bad to none at all does that to you. With a sigh I tear my gaze away from my own face, this too would get better in time, or so I told myself.

Stepping out of the bathroom I jump a step back again when I see someone else standing in the room. A second later when I realize it’s Orion I almost drop my towel in shock. He stands perfectly still dressed in a pair of nice black pants, black shoes, and a light blue dress shirt with the sleeves rolled up baring his muscular forearms. I don't think he's ever looked so good. Except maybe when i had him nak-

Oh no Juliette, do NOT think about that now.

“Juliette I...um…” he starts, taking a few hesitant steps towards me. Digging my thoughts out of the gutter they’d fallen into, I pull my towel a little tighter around my chest as he approaches, trying to avoid checking him out again. Losing my restraint in Nova’s room would just be disgraceful. “Jaxon found another colony we can use to let The Promise rest and restock. He also insists that while we’re here we need to celebrate destroying Ragnarok, just for tonight. There’s a club that even Atlas and Nova agreed to go to. I wasn’t sure you had anything so I...took the liberty of getting you something to wear if you wanted,” for the first time I noticed the box he had in his hands as he held it out to me, my name written across the top. Stepping closer to him I used my free hand to lift off the lid and gasped when I saw the bright red bundle lying inside. I’ve never owned anything that vibrant.

I pulled the dress out of the box, smiling softly as I looked it over. “Would you mind...um...turning around?” I asked quietly. Orion had seen me naked before but changing but with things being as they were between us I didn’t feel comfortable changing in front of him.

Wordlessly Orion obliged, setting the empty box down on Nova’s bed before turning around and placing a hand over his eyes. Thankful he didn’t comment I dress quickly, pulling the dress up as soon as I’ve gotten into my underwear. The soft fabric hugs my body up my thighs and over my hips until loosening around the torso. Putting a hand behind my back I reach for the zipper, only to struggle to grasp it amongst the extra fabric.

My face blushes fiercely as I realize I’m going to have to ask for his help getting the zipper up. “Um...Orion? I...I can’t get the zipper…” I call to him from across the room, hoping he’ll fill in the blanks and I won’t have to explicitly ask.

I glance up to see him slowly turn back to face me before dropping my eyes back to floor, hoping I’m just slightly less red than this dress. “Are you okay with me helping?” he asks, his voice sounds like he’s trying to be careful with his tone, though part of me notes a hint of hopefulness. I nod my response, still refusing to meet his eyes and turn so he can get to the zipper on my dress. I force myself not to jump when I feel his hands on my back, easily finding the zipper and pulling it up. I fiddle with the hem and sleeves of the dress for a moment until it feels like it’s sitting correctly then turn back to him.

As soon as I turn around I see his eyes look me up and down and then they meet mine and he looks at me with the same amount of love and affection I’d seen in his face so many times before. “Juliette, you look so beautiful,” he whispers and his hands start reach out towards me before a flash of pain crosses his face and his arms fall back to his side. Orion takes a second to clear his throat and his expression returns to that cool, collected demeanor of a Captain. “I’ll leave you to finish getting ready” he states, his voice taking on a tone as carefully composed as his expression.

WIthout another word Orion turns, snatches the empty box off the bed, and briskly leaves the room. My eyes follow his movements to see another box left on the bed behind him, and I can see my name written on this one too. I open this one too and my stomach does a flip at the size of the heels sitting inside. I slip them onto my feet and try a few experimental steps, my feet wobbling precariously in the tall shoes.

Oh hubble. I was going to make a fool of myself.


	2. Carry You Home (pt. 2)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> At the club Juliette discovers both her dancing feet and Orion’s.

The deep, pulsating beat of club music reaches us before we even enter the doors and another pang of doubt hits me, almost making me wish I’d stayed on the ship. Stubborn me refused to be the only one staying behind. Just once when I needed someone to be the buzzkill Atlas comes out to have fun. Everyone must be feeling the tension on the ship more than I’d thought if even he agreed to go dancing tonight.

An intimidatingly tall alien stands at the door, staring down our group with a scowl. For a moment it feels like my prayers for the night to end early will be answered before Jaxon sidles up to him and gets us all in with no problem.

The scene inside the club assaults my senses and my eyes dart around the room, unsure what to look at first. The music is blaringly loud on the inside and the dance floor pulses with lights and people of every shape, size, and color. I follow the rest of the crew as they make their way towards the dance floor feeling way too uncomfortable here to go off on my own even if I really wasn’t ready to dance yet either.

No one else appears to share my inhibitions and the other four members of the crew blend in seamlessly with the rest of the dancers. I try to copy some of the movements of the other women around me but with the monstrous heels on my feet I can barely stay standing much less keep up the coordination required to dance like them. Gritting my teeth I fight the embarrassment threatening to overwhelm me for the rest of the song, hoping against hope than no one is watching me too closely.

When it finally ends and Atlas announces that he’s going to get a drink and take a breather, I can’t join him fast enough. He acknowledges my presence with a tilt of his head and orders something fruity for me but still doesn’t say a word to me directly as we scan the bar area surrounding the dance floor for an empty table. My legs are shaking so bad that as soon as we find one I nearly fall down onto the seat. Trying to calm my frazzled nerves I down a few gulps of my drink, the light burn of the alcohol giving me something to focus on other than how awful I must have looked out there.

I know I must look a hot mess but thankfully Atlas doesn’t comment on it. We sit together in silence for the first song, just watching the other three dance. When the second one starts and no one comes to join us he suddenly speaks up, “You're everything to him, you know?”

I answer his rhetorical question with more silence, my eyes fixated on my glass and heat starts to spread up my neck, making me burn with shame. I did know, didn't I? And I still did this to him -to us- because I couldn't let him mourn, because I was hurt by how upset he was over his friend dying. Maybe I never really got over my jealousy of Rhea. Maybe I expected things to go right back to normal with her gone. Whatever it was, watching everyone dance like they had problems they needed to forget, reminded me just how much trouble I was causing everyone. Seconds stretch on like hours in the silence and when I can't take it anymore I look up at Atlas to find his eyes studying me. “Will I ever stop making stupid mistakes?” I ask, my voice wobbling with all the sadness of the past week.

Atlas just shrugs and averts his eyes at that one, taking another long, slow drink from his cup. “That's up to you,” he answers simply and makes a gesture with his head. Following his gaze I find Orion staring at me and the distance between us feels like miles even though it can't be more than a few yards. His attention diverts away from me as soon as he sees me looking, and I can’t help the stinging feeling that gives me. Frowning, I down the rest of my drink hoping the alcohol can do something for this pain. Atlas raises an eyebrow at me but says nothing, simply moving to draw the attention of a waiter for another set of drinks for the two of us.

Another song passes before Jaxon, Nova and Orion join us at our table. Seeing the empty glasses in front of Atlas and I Jaxon offers to grab the next round for everyone from the bar. The next couple of songs pass with idle chatter between the five of us and just as I finish up my third drink the DJ calls out over the speakers, “can I get all the ladies on the dance floor?”

My eyes meet Nova’s from my spot across the table from her and she just shrugs in response to my questioningly look before getting up and gesturing for me to join her. Against what must be my better judgement I follow and as we walk towards the dance floor I feel stomach turn in flips knowing that all the boys will be watching me make a fool of myself.

Again.

But as we join the crowd of dancing women I realize this song is either perfectly engineered to be impossible not to dance to or the alcohol is taking over because my body starts to move on it’s own in a way that I know I’ve never danced before. I don’t know if it looks good or even looks like dancing but it feels right to me. Once I let go of my doubts and inhibitions it actually feels fun! I’ve never been to a club before, the closest I ever got was school dances but now that I’m here I understand why so many people enjoy it. The loud music and the ability to just let yourself be...I could feel some of the weight of the last week start to fall off. Despite the near-constant urge to look back at the boys I manage to fight it throughout the whole song and just enjoy myself.

The song ends all too quickly and the DJ invites the rest of the club back onto the floor. Nova gives me a small wave before heading back to the table and then I'm alone in the throng of people. Letting the next song flow over me like the last I keep dancing, but this time I can't stop the urge to look back and my eyes instantly go to Orion’s. His eyes track my every movement with an intensity and a hunger that lights a fire low in my stomach. My heart feels ripped in half at that moment. On the one hand I want to grin now that I know my dancing had to be at least be somewhat decent to earn a look like that from him. On the other...seeing him look at me like that knowing neither of us will act on it just makes me want to burst into a fresh set of tears.

I turn away again before my emotions get the best of me and avoid looking back again for the rest of the song. Once it ends I glance back again to see the table empty of our crew and immediately I stop moving, my eyes frantically searching the rest of the bar area for them. I can't see anyone from where I stand and I start to move off the dance floor to look for them when a strong arm wraps around my waist and turns me so I'm chest to chest with the arm’s owner. I'm about to shove them away when I look up to see Orion looking right back down at me with that same intensity he had at the table. “Dance with me,” he says, and I shiver at the familiar commanding tone in his voice.

“Okay,” I speak quietly, though I know the way he spoke meant it wasn't a question. Tentatively I bring my arms up to wrap around his neck and his other hand comes to my waist. He holds me to him as we sway together and for the first time tonight the lyrics to the song playing overhead ring in my ears.

_ Everybody needs a little room to make mistakes.You don't have to be so perfect. You can go at your own pace. Just show me the real you. So that I can feel you. I promise I won't let you down _

As the first few lines of the song play I can't help but feel that this song was chosen specifically for us. How could six little sentences describe us so perfectly? I wasn't one to really call anything “fate” but if anything was...this was it. My eyes meet Orion’s again and I wonder if he’s thinking the same thing. His face rests in that unreadable mask I remember so well from before we were together. He hasn’t hidden his emotions from me so well in a long time and I find myself wishing I hadn’t been the one to bring it back.

_ Let me carry you home.  _ __   
_ When there's no one to turn to and all you've had faith in is gone. _ _   
_ __ Let me carry you home.

As the beat of the song picks up at the end of the first chorus, so does our pace. Orion expertly twirls me and then pulls me back to him before turning me back out again, and for the first time tonight I laugh. My lips settle into a genuine smile as he pulls me to his side before turning us in a slow circle around an invisible axis between us. I had no idea Orion could dance like that. It felt a bit formal for a club but it was very fitting for him.

_ Everyone deserves a little precious time to stumble 'til they find a little piece of mind. _

The song slows back down leading into the second verse and with another twirl Orion turns me so that my back is to him. My hands lay overtop of his where they rest on the stomach as we return to a slow swaying motion, our hips moving perfectly in time together.

_ Let me carry you home. _

_ When you're tired and you're weary and you have no strength to go on.  _ _   
_ _ Let me carry you home. _

“I miss you Juliette,” Orion whispers at my ear, pulling me as tightly against his chest as possible. “I’ve missed you so much. Please. Let me carry you home. To  _ our _ home on The Promise, to  _ our _ bed, and to  _ our _ room that has never felt more empty than it does without your presence. I don’t want to spend another night without you.” I would have smiled at his use of the song we were dancing to if his sudden plea hadn’t made my heart shatter with all the loneliness we’ve suffered this week. This time apart has been awful for the both of us and even though I still don’t think he’s accepted Rhea’s death I can’t bare to put him through any more pain.

I turn myself so I’m facing him again and lift a hand to cup his cheek. A soft smile works its way across his face as I look up into his eyes, and the hope I see in them melts my heart. “I’ve missed you too, let’s go home,” I whisper back. Orion doesn’t need to be told twice and in an instant he has an arm hooked under my legs to literally sweep me off my feet into a bridal carry.

As we head for the door I hear Jaxon let out a whoop behind us. Lifting my head enough to look back over Orion’s shoulder I follow Jaxon’s voice to where the three of them stand on the dance floor. “Way to get her back, Cap!” Jaxon hollers after us, punching a fist in the air. Atlas punches his shoulder but I can see him grinning at us too, and even Nova wears an approving smile. I lift one hand from where they rest around Orion’s neck to wave goodbye before we’re out the doors and headed back to the ship through the cool night air.


	3. Carry You Home (pt. 3)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Orion and Juliette waste very little time making up back on The Promise. (NSFW)

There isn’t much conversation between us as Orion carries me through the colony back to The Promise. Everytime I insist that I can walk and he doesn’t need to carry me the whole way he silences me with a searing kiss. And how can a girl focus on walking when she’s being kissed like that? So I let him carry me, grateful that The Promise isn’t too far away, and he doesn’t set me down until the door to our bedroom slides shut behind us. I barely have time to kick off my shoes before his lips are on mine again.

Pushing me back against the wall Orion kisses me with a feverish need. I’m absolutely breathless before Orion pulls his lips off mine, his breathing as heavy as mine in the small space between us. “I’ve wanted to do that all night. Since you first put on that dress,” his voice is barely above as whisper and so husky my body flushes with heat.

“Then...you should do it again,” I whisper back.

Orion smiles at me and happily follows my request. His hands travel up and down my sides slowly, pausing on my butt to give me a firm squeeze. At first I jump when he does, but then I relax into his touch as my body remembers the feel of his hands. Every muscle in me responds to his touch like it’s drowning and he’s the only air around. For once my brain agrees with my body and I soak up every part of him I can get. My hands snake down from his neck to his chest and I set to work on the buttons holding his shirt closed.

It’s slow going getting the buttons undone while I’m being distracted with kisses, and I grow more frustrated the longer it takes to get to his bare skin. “This is a lot harder to get off than your normal clothes,” I grumble in the space between kisses when we break for a breath. Orion chuckles and steps back, his hands leaving my sides to help me with his shirt. Before his hands even get there I smack them away and ball the fabric of his shirt in my hands, using it to tug him flush up against me again. “I still want to do it,” my voices come out in a growl and I think we’re both a little surprised by the possessiveness of my tone. Although judging by the way he grins at me before moving in to kiss me again I think he likes it.

He returns his hands to my body, gently rubbing up and down. I finally manage to undo the last button, throwing open the sides open with a flourish. My hands eagerly run down his bare chest to his hard abs while my lips work their way down to the hollow where his neck and shoulder meet. I nip there once with my teeth and gasp against his skin as his hands grip the backs of my thighs hard. “Juliette…” he groans my name, and I refuse to let up until he’s driven as mad as I am. Sucking gently on his soft skin I feel his grip on my legs tighten until he lifts me up without warning, making me squeal when my feet suddenly leave the floor.

Once I realize I’m still safe in his arms I wrap my legs around his waist, trying to lighten my weight while he carries me to the bed. He sits us down and I feel the skirt of my dress ride up my hips as his hands slip under it to touch the skin underneath. He gives me another squeeze before his hands travel up my back, stopping at the top of my zipper. He starts to pull it down but it only moves about an inch or two before I feel it stop.

He pulls out of the kiss a moment to give the zipper a few more concentrated yanks and a small crease forms between his brows when it still doesn’t budge. His hands shift to get a good handle on the two sides of the dress and my eyes widen when I realize what he’s about to do. Before I can say anything an ugly ripping sound fills the room as the zipper is forcibly torn open and the dress falls loose about my shoulders. “You just ripped my dress!” I blurted out, shocked even as he tugs the torn dress up and over my head.

“I’ll buy you a new one,” he assures me, a smug smile playing on his lips while his eyes rake up my exposed body like it’s the first time he’s ever seen it. “You are so beautiful,” he says once he’s finished looking me over. My face blushes but my chest swells with pride. Which shouldn’t be surprising. Orion has a way of both flustering me and making me feel like I’m the only one he sees at the same time.

I pull his shirt off his shoulders and he lifts his arms to let me take it the rest of the way off. “Not so bad yourself,” I respond cheekily, taking my time to look over his broad chest and chiseled abs, frowning at the waistband of his pants that prevents my eyes from seeing any lower.

“Oh yeah? Well then let me show you just how good I can be,” with those words Orion sends another flare of heat through my core. Lifting me again slightly he flips us so I’m on my back with him hovering above me. One of his hands strokes down my side and his fingers hook in the waistband of my underwear. “Is it alright if I…?” he stops to ask for permission before pulling them down, a sudden flash of uncertainty crossing his face.

I realize now that we didn’t really talk about how far we were taking things tonight and I nod to let him know it’s okay to keep going. Reassured he takes off the rest of my clothes and tosses them onto the pile already on the floor. Suddenly feeling very naked compared to him I put a hand on his chest to stop him as he leans back into kiss me. “You too,” I say, trying to take on the commanding tone he uses, and glancing down to where he’s still covered by his clothing.

“Aye, aye,” he answers with a grin. He gets of the bed, leaving me bare just a moment to slip out of his pants before returning to cover my body with his own. Now that we’re both at the same level of nudity I’m much more comfortable and my body thrums with anticipation as he leans down to kiss my skin. He starts at my collarbone, and then his lips travel down, agonizingly slowly, until he finally settles between my legs.

My hand finds its way to his hair while mouth works me into a frenzy. My head tips back in pleasure and his name falls from my lips as a moan over and over again. His hands hold onto my hips so that even as I start to squirm from the pleasure he keeps me right where he wants me. He stays there until I’m panting, my moans barely coming out in breathy gasps, and begging for him to take me all the way.

He kisses his way back up to my lips, he pulls back again to ask, “do you want to keep going?” When I give him another nod of consent he buries himself into me, a low groan escaping his lips. He starts slow and careful, his eyes constantly watching me for any sign of discomfort. Tentatively, he picks up both the speed and force of his thrusts and when my chest arcs up towards him in pleasure he takes that as encouragement. As his pace steadily increases, the pressure in my body builds until it finally releases. I cry out his name desperately as my body rides the waves of pleasure, my hips moving in time with his. Orion kisses me deeply and slows his movements as I come down from my high.

He pulls back and lays beside me. Our bodies are both slick with sweat but neither of us care as I snuggle into his chest. As I lay there feeling like I’m on cloud 9 from head to toe I wonder how I ever managed to stay away from him this long. “I love you,” I whisper softly, and then my whole body tenses up. It’s not like my feelings have changed in a week, and I hope his haven’t either, but sleeping together once doesn’t fix everything. We haven’t talked about what this means for us, I can only hope that saying I love you now isn’t too soon.

Orion is silent for a while after that and when I finally brave my fear to lift my head and look at him I see the marks of tears on his cheeks. When he sees me looking at him he quickly wipes them away with one hand and smiles at me. “I’m sorry, it just feels so good to hear you say that again,” he explains, and immediately my fears ebb away. He kisses my forehead softly and then whispers, “I love you too.”

For a moment after he says that everything in the world feels perfect. I know tomorrow we’ll still have to talk about this and probably Rhea too, but for now I’m content to let myself fall asleep in his arms.


	4. Carry You Home (pt. 4)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Orion’s finally ready to mourn the loss of a friend, and the crew holds a memorial for her.

Waking up the next morning tucked against Orion’s chest flooded me with a feeling of rightness. Like all our time apart this week had been somehow wrong and unnatural and being back together was where we were supposed to be. Judging by how warm and comfortable I felt being back in our bed, and how well I slept for the first time this week I couldn’t disagree.

I feel Orion stir beside me and after realizing I was awake too his grip around me tightens and he nuzzles his face into the back of my neck. “Good morning,” his voice was still thick with sleep and barely audible against my skin but I still melt into him, just glad to be back by his side.

“Good morning,” I whisper back and twist until I can peck him on the lips. His eyes are still closed but his lips curl into a smile at my touch and he leans in to kiss me again. When he pulls back he opens his eyes slowly and once they met mine his expression fills with relief, like he’d expected me to disappear as soon as he looked at me.

He kisses me again, deeply with every ounce of love he has pouring into the kiss, and by the time he pulls back I’m breathless. “This...morning...too?” I manage to breathe out, my mind already reeling with where a kiss like that is going to lead.

Even though it’s not a very well-worded question Orion still catches my meaning, and chuckles softly. “If you want to…” he starts, with that sultry hint in his tone that sends a spark down low in my stomach. “But that wasn’t my intent. It’s been a lot of disappointing mornings waking up without you. It just feels good to have you back.” With that I kiss him again, another pang of guilt hitting me that I’d left him so alone when he needed me, and we snuggle back in for a few more minutes of cuddle time. The crew could wait for that much longer.

We stay like that for a while longer, just curled up with each other, and I relish the feel of his body next me and the even breathing against my neck. Then Orion speaks again, his voice very quiet, “I’ve been thinking...would you be okay helping me have a memorial service for Rhea? I…” He trails off and clears his throat before continuing, but I could still hear the tears he keeps at bay in his voice. “I never got to properly mourn her the first time, and I think she’d like to be laid to rest even...even if we don’t have her body.” For where his arms rest against my skin I can feel the muscles in his arms and hands quiver, whether with nerves or sadness I can’t tell.

I gently stroke my thumb across the hand that’s wrapped around my waist, trying to soothe him while I think over what he said. I didn’t want to rush him to put Rhea behind him. I’d thought about that a lot during our time apart. If I expected him to mourn I had to let him, and him being willing to have a memorial for her sounded like he was ready to accept that she was gone, and finally heal from all these years of pain and guilt. “Okay,” I answer, “what do you think she’d like? Should we go back to Johdo 3?”

They had probably been too young to ever talk about what kind of death services they’d wanted the first time it happened, and they didn’t get the chance this time, but Rhea and I could’ve been friends, I wanted us to be friends, and I agreed with Orion. She deserved to have a proper service after everything she’d done for us and for everyone else.

Orion loosens his grip around me to lift himself up onto one elbow and look down at me, a thoughtful look on his face. “No,” he answers, “I think here will be just fine. We joined the Empire to get away from our colony, I think she’d like a memorial here on another planet outside of their control, like...like she was able to be free in the...in the end.” I can tell when he starts to strain to say the words, like he almost doesn’t want to admit them. As sad as it is and as much as I wish I could take away all his pain I’m still proud of him for facing this.

I gently push him to the side so I can sit up and pluck my tablet up from the table beside the bed. I skim through a page full of touristy information about the area until my eyes alight upon something in particular. “How about this?” I ask, and turn the tablet to show him the page. “There’s a lake not too far from where we’re docked, we could find a nice spot on the beach and say a few words. Do you have anything of hers you’d like to bury maybe?” I know it’s not the same as having a burial and I’m not sure what kind of funeral rites Orion is used to, but I watch his expression carefully while he thinks and he seems to like the idea.

Wordlessly he reaches over his side of the bed and pulls out the tablet that holds the hologram photo of him, Rhea, and Antares. “We can’t scatter her ashes but what do you think about getting a physical copy of this and burning it?” he asks and I smile softly, reaching one hand over to rub circles on his back.

“That sounds very fitting,” and then I look back down at the holo of the three of them, realization dawning when I remember the last time we saw the third. “What about Antares?” I ask, keeping my voice soft. We still didn’t know if he’d survived Evander’s ship, and even if he made my skin crawl he deserved something to commemorate his death.

Orion’s eyes darted over to his brother on the other side of Rhea and sighed when he comes to the same conclusion as me. “No, let’s just let this be about her. I’ll have time to mourn Antares when I know he’s dead,” he said, and I just nod my agreement. I wasn’t willing to be the one to dash the small degree of hope in his voice. If he wanted to wait until there was a confirmation on Antares then that’s what we’d do.

A comfortable silence falls over us for the next few minutes until Orion finally drags himself from the bed. “I’ll inform the crew where we’ll be, are you okay with going this morning?” I nod again and follow him out the bed to start getting dressed. Orion dresses briskly and heads for the bridge, leaving the tablet behind for me to print off a physical copy of their picture while he lets the others know.

Once I’ve finally got one in hand I join him on the bridge by the open hatch where the whole crew stands as if to follow. I look at Orion quizzically and Nova answers my unspoken question for him, “the Captain told us what he desired to do and we all would like to be there.” Orion looks back at the crew, a grateful expression covering his face and I give his hand a light squeeze before we all file out into the morning light.

It doesn’t take us long to reach the lake I’d read about and everyone shifts uncomfortably in the silence once we find a stretch of the rock beach that’s still unoccupied. Orion stands at the edge of the water, the picture in his hand, but he doesn’t speak and no one else is quite sure how to begin. So instead of saying anything I just stand at Orion’s side with an arm around his waist and wait patiently for him to start.

Finally, he clears his throat and starts to speak, his voice thick with unshed tears. “The first time Rhea died I was at fault, and I’ve lived with that guilt ever since. It destroyed my relationship with my brother and that put all of you in danger. Finding out that she’d never died in the first place would’ve been a dream come true if the circumstances were different. Even with things as they were I’d hoped that after everything with Ragnarok and Tyberius was over she could have her own life and I could fix the mistakes of the past between the three of us.” He pauses to stare down at the picture in his hands for a few long moments and I gently stroke a hand up and down his back. “I don’t understand why she threw away the future she could have had when she’d already been saved from my mistake. I don’t know if I ever will, but you’ve all made me see the truth in what happened. She saved us, she saved everyone from Tyberius and from Ragnarok, and I wish I could have done the same for her. But even though I wish things had turned out differently I will always be grateful for everything she’s done and I’m proud to know that my best friend was a hero for so many.”

Orion stoops down down next to the water and flicks on the lighter we’d brought. it doesn’t take but a moment for the photo to catch fire and as the flames quickly lick across the surface the breeze carries the ashes of the paper into the lake. We all watch somberly as the faces in the photo steadily burn away until it’s gone and the silence stretches out again. Orion sits back on the rocks and I gingerly lower myself to sit beside him.

Cautiously, I take his hand in mine and when he doesn’t pull away I lean in against him. We watch the waves lap against our shoes until I speak softly, feeling compelled to say something so Orion doesn’t have to bear the burden alone. “I didn’t know her long, but it didn’t take long to see why you were such good friends. I wanted to be her friend too,” I paused to turn and look back at the crew, remembering how close we’d all become in my time with them. “She died to save my friends, and that makes her a friend to me.”

After I finish Orion looks over at me with a soft smile to show his gratitude. Each of our other crew members take a turn to speak for Rhea, even if they don’t have much to say, and as each one finishes speaking they join us on the ground at the water’s edge.

We all stay like that for a long time, sitting in companionable silence, until Orion sighs heavily and pushes himself up to his feet, dropping a hand down to help me up. He presses a kiss to my temple once I’m on my feet and turns to the crew with his old cool, confidence that I’ve become so used to.

“Let’s go home.”


End file.
